Matthew 10:11-13 says, "Now whatever city or town you enter, inquire who in it is worthy, and stay there till you go out. And when you go into a household, greet it. If the household is worthy, let your peace come upon it. But if it is not worthy, let your peace return to you." This is how God blesses homes.
Your house needs to be a house worthy of the blessing of God. So I want to give you Five Essentials to a Godly Home.
1. You need prayer in that home. In Luke 19:46 Jesus says, "My house will be a house of prayer." Teach your children that God will answer their prayers. If God's house is a house of prayer, yours should be one too.
2. Speak the Word in that home. Deuteronomy 6:6-9 says, "These commandments that I give you today are to be upon your hearts. Impress them on your children. Talk about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up. Tie them as symbols on your hands and bind them on your foreheads. Write them on the doorframes of your houses and on your gates."
3. Make it a house of humility. James 4:6. God can bless humility. He resists the proud.
4. Make it a house of giving. Malachi 3:10 says, "Bring ye all the tithes into the storehouse, that there may be meat in mine house, and prove me now herewith, saith the LORD of hosts, if I will not open you the windows of heaven, and pour you out a blessing, that there shall not be room enough to receive it."
5. You need leadership in your house. Joshua 24:15 says, "As for me and my house we will serve the Lord." Take a stand, and have leadership in that home.
The Four Stages of Raising Children
As you train your children in the way they should go, it's important to understand The Four Stages of Growth in Your Children so they will grow up to hear God's voice and make right decisions
1.Discipline Stage 0-5 years
CREATE CLEAR AND VERY STRICT BOUNDARIES - no choices; you're teaching them to yield their will to your will so they will eventually be able to yield to God's will.
WHEN YOU'RE SPEAKING TO THEM EXPECT A RESPONSE - otherwise you're teaching them not to have regard for your commands. Your children will rise to the level of your expectation. One of the reasons God chose Abraham was because "he will command his children," Genesis 18:19 says.
MAKE YOUR INSTRUCTION CLEAR - Colossians 3:21 says don't exasperate your children. Warn them that the command is coming. "In 5 minutes, I'm going to call you and I want you to be finished."
2. Training stage 6-12 years
This is where you are training your children to be young adults. They are pretending to be in that role. Give them some grace. Give them more choices. For example, "Here are 3 choices, but remember when you make a decision, you're not going to change it."
Teach them to make their bed and clean their room. Now let them do it. Check it. Show them where they need to improve.
3. Coaching stage 13-19 years
During this stage, you let them be the quarterback of their life. You're the coach, but you let them play. You're not driving them. They drive. You coach. You call some plays, but let them call some.
When they make a decision, you ask "So what did you decide?" Then you say, "let me give you some pros and cons about that." You still give them your advice.
4. Fellowship stage (friendship)
You've done your job. You give advice only when they ask for it. You can't try to be their friend during the Discipline and Training stages. This is the time you can be their friend, when you've done your job correctly in the earlier stages. It's tragic if we don't honor the Discipline stage. It affects the rest of their life and yours too.
Now that you have these practical stages of how to teach your children as they mature, remember what sets it all up is when your house has the 5 Essentials for the Blessing of God. God will bless and honor you as you honor Him and put Him first in your home.
Your partner in the gospel,
Pastor Terry Aaron